Sunday, November 23, 2008

Strange times are upon me. Clair and her mom have gone to eli nevada for a couple days. My grandmother and father came down for the weekend. The economic crunch is starting to be felt all around. And here I sit yet again... out back... Smoking a cigarette... Waiting on a client. Kind of feels like groundhog day sometimes.

I miss clair. It's only been 24 hours... And I already feel lost. She really gives me purpose and direction.. I just never realize how much til she's gone. I hope she's having a good time. Last word I had on her was that they were going on a hike. Beautiful day for it. She needs some nature. Anyways.... I'm off to scar the world... Where the fuck is my client?!?!?!

Sunday, November 16, 2008

Shiiiiiiiiiiit...... I just wrote two cigarettes worth of stuff to blog.... I hit send.... Now I have no idea where it is.... Damn it! I tried to blog... I swear

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Why So Serious

Well... Finally a free moment. I'm sitting out in back of the shop, smoking a cigarette waiting on my next client to show. Nothing big tonight... Just adding some grew clouds to my buddies arms and back. Guess I better catch up.... Or at least catch my readers up.
The new shop is still progressing along. A sign company did a mock up of what the space would look like with the evilution sigh above it. Gotta say... Looked cool.... But not sure if it's $14000 cool. I just really liked the look.. And I got stoked thinking that one day it will be a reality. I still get nervous thinking about the money aspect of things.... But really... Who the hell doesn't. Especially now a days when everyone's hurting. Thank god tattoos seem to be recession proof... Or at least not as effected as other people. I have a few people on deck for workers. Might even have Megan out here as a piercer. I think it would be cool t get a tight knit group of artists. I miss that about the eagle vail ink lounge... And mountain ink. I loved the artist feeding off other artist aspect of those times. It seems like it I lost it somewhere. It's funny. I started taking some blank white canvas shoes and painted/drew on them. It's the first piece of art I can remember doing for myself in a long time. Sad I guess... But hell... That's the tattoo biz. My catharsis stuff has to come out... I just put it in other peoples artwork. Sucks when I feel like drawing a crying eye for me, but I have to sketch a pretty flower with a nautical star for some client. I keep hearing people tell me I need balance... But how the hell can you have balance when you need to clear $4500 a month. I sneak down time when I can... But fuck. Anyways....
Clair and I are doing good right now. Hmmm.... After just writing that sentence I don't know how to follow it up. I keep thinking about who's going to read this and what ramifications it will have. I remember back in the day when i'd write i'd have to deal with phone calls the next day from people wondering if I was suicidal or just depressed. Now I have a wonderful girlfriend who doesn't understand why I don't write more about her. Simple answer .... I don't want her to think i'm not being honest and open with her when we're face to face. Things could be misinterpreted. I'm such a pussy. Screw it... Clair and I are cool. We stress about money.. About family... And about our apartment. She cleans like crazy and i'm a slob. Not a gross slob... I just tend have piles of paperwork floating around... And cloths.... Damn it. I don't mean to be. I just lose focus when i'm doing things... And then I lose time.... Then shit piles up. Sucks. Our beef with family's is a constant strain. Everyone is cool... Her folks love me... My folks love her... We just haven't figured out the rolls that everyone plays. It's a strain but we're working on it. Money is pretty self explanatory.... Just another strain. Las Vegas is far from my last destination in life... And clair hates it. I just want to get the shop up and self sustaining.. Then.... Open up the next one.... Not sure where yet. I'm trying to stay focused one this shop. Why I wanna work hard and make this happen big. You know...95% of things are perfect... And the other 5% is just standard relationship shit. If it was perfect it would be boring. I think we're as perfect as we can be. I love her and she loves me.. What the hell else can I ask for.
Life is interesting. I mentioned that I lose focus lately. It's weird. I'll have 6 different thing's i'll want to do. See the girlfriend... Do other things with the girlfriend ... Blog... Clean... Draw... Update web stuff.... Run the numbers from the shop.... Reply to the phone calls I got during the day... Watch some downloaded show or movie... Feed the cat and piggy.... Cuddle the girlfriend.... Pay bills... Check bank account.... Fret.... Worry... Sleep.... Do it all again. Ever notice when things get busy and crazy.... People tend to suck more. I had a couple social situations lately that just made me cringe. Sometimes you have expectations of people. You think they're cool... Then they just fade. This I the problem with having hope in people. I hate looking at people and knowing how things are going to turn out.... Or worse... Knowing what must have happened to them to get them to the point they're at. People in denial or just turning a blind eye. It's ruff to watch. It's a reason I didn't like counseling. So much potential wasted. So much energy wasted on meaningless shit. It crawls up the soul like poisons root and just destroys the host. I've found that when I'm riding my motorcycle home and I think about those people people.. I just shake my head and sigh. It's sad. Goodnight princess... Goodnight prince. I hope the light finds you before you hit the walls I had to. You will be missed if you do fall.... But by not by as many if you just pulled up out of the nose dive. Anyways.....
Bet you're wondering if I was talking about you now, huh? Does it seem like it? Maybe I am.
Looks like my client just pulled up.... Woo-hoo!

Monday, November 10, 2008

I was hoping to write a big blog tonight but I dicked around too long trying to update evilutiontattoos.com. Now i'm just too tired. Maybe I'll do it tomorrow sometime since I think i'm gonna take the day off. I got tons to write about.... But for now... Smoke then sleep

Saturday, November 01, 2008

 
Made it a year.... wow .... time really has skipped by. Now if the cake people only knew how to spell "tattoo".
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